Stop using 'Rape' as a catch all verb

The word Rape means Rape. It does not mean "anything bad that happened to me".
Exams and assignments aren't capable of actually raping you. Inanimate objects and abstract ideas are not capable of raping you. One football team is capable of raping another football team, but saying that does not accurately describe what you meant to say, which is that one team won against the other in a game. A GAME. FOR FUN.

From 'Rape is Not Only Hilarious; It's No Big Deal';

Rape is a big deal, and the very least we can do for those who have suffered its excruciating indignity is talk about it with the honesty and gravity it deserves.

Once Again: Rape Is Not Your Personal Metaphor

Rape Culture: Still Not Funny

Passive Aggression: Foregrounding The Object

Inspired by the furore of Matthew Johns

Situations that are Definitely Rape:

In case you have a hard time figuring it out, these are some situations that are Definitely Rape/Sexual Assault!

- Consenting to have sex with two footballers, and upon entering the bedroom, being forced to have sex with another eight.
- Consenting to perform oral sex on your partner, and then being forced to have intercourse even though you said no.
- When you tell your husband you do not want to have sex and he makes you do it anyway.
- Meeting a guy in a bar, kissing him, going back to his place and telling him that you do not want to have sex tonight, then he forces himself on you.
- Beginning to have consensual sex with your partner, realising you are not in the mood, or you are being hurt, telling your partner to stop, and they continue anyway.
- Getting so drunk at a party that some guy helps you back to a room to lie down, then has sex with you while you are too drunk to move or talk.

- Having sex with one guy, then having sex with his friend, not wanting to have sex with his third friend, but he forces himself on you anyway.

The common theme in all of these situations is that somebody GOT RAPED. Rape is not rough sex. Rape is about control. It is showing another person that you do not view or value them as a person. Sex is the means by which to control. Rape is not about sex.

'Sluts' are not free game because they had sex with numerous people consensually before. When someone says they do not want to have sex with you, at the point in time that you are requesting sex, you are not allowed to have sex with them. Victims of rape DO NOT have a responsibility to NOT GET RAPED. RAPISTS have a responsibility NOT to rape. It is the rapist's fault that he raped someone. Rape is not a mistake.

If you are genuinely worried that your sexual encounter with a woman could be misconstrued as rape I urge you to take a few moments to check a few things.
- Are you sober? Is she sober? Is she drunk? Is she drunker than you? Is she so drunk that you doubt her ability to answer a simple math problem such as "What does 1 + 1 equal"?
- So you're both sober huh? Have you both let each other know that you like each other, and in so many words, respect each other as individuals?
- Have you discussed having sex before? Did she expressly say that she was or was not interested?

- Oh, so you think you're about to have sex huh? Is she making noises and letting you know in no uncertain terms that yes, oh yes, oh dear me, I really would enjoy having sex with you! At this moment in time, I am consenting and asking your consent in return!....in so many words?

Basically, if you aren't getting Enthusiastic Consent, back the fuck off. And if you are truly afraid or unsure of how your sexual advances will be taken by a woman, perhaps you should try getting to know her and earning her trust before you think it's okay by any stretch of imagination to just have sex with her anyway.