Womb With A View

My boyfriend has been doing something lately that has been pissing me right off. So of course, I write a blog post about it, one which he will most likely never read, therefore avoiding any possible confrontation as I do best.
There are two things that he has been trying to CHANGE in me. I know you're all going "oh that's not cool, run girlfriend!" and yeah, I know it's insane, but I thought he was joking. I can't tell if he's joking anymore.

The first thing is that he's trying to make me eat bananas. I haven't eaten a banana since I was 5 years old, I remember the very last time. There was a boy in pre-school who had it in for me, and kept a banana in his lunchbox, the same banana, for an entire week, until it was brown and disgusting. Then one day he smooshed it all over my face. To make a sob story short, the smell of bananas makes me gag. I can tell if there's a piece of fruit that's been sitting NEXT to a banana. I can tell if groceries have been in the same bag as a banana. I can smell it on his breath when he's eaten bananas. I fucking loathe bananas.
But my boyfriend can't seem to understand this. "They're so good for you! They taste great! It's just a banana! Come on! If you just eat enough, you'll end up liking it."
No. I won't. I don't like bananas. They make me sick.
He's been trying really subtle sneaky shit, like buying banana bread, and telling me it's just some fancy cake. Of course, I can smell it before it's even in my mouth, so this never works.
But I just can't get why he would want me to eat bananas so badly. How is it impacting on him? PLEASE DEAR GOD, I DON'T WANT TO EAT ANY OF YOUR FREAKIN BANANAS.

Now that I've gone over that paragraph, it reads back to me like;
"Dear Agony Aunt. This friend of mine, well she um, her boyfriend keeps trying to pressure her to have butt sex. But she doesn't want butt sex. And well um, I just, I mean, my friend just wanted to know how to make him stop without actually giving in to the butt sex."
I promise you, it's not that. I love butt sex.

The other thing that pisses me off more than anything else in the entire world, is his insistence that I will someday have his children. Normally, I think this would make most girls go "awww that is so sweet, he's so committed to you!"
But he only wants me to have his children because he wants to, in his words "carry on his bloodline". Because you're just a sad nobody unless you have children to carry on your surname for years and years to come. No one will remember you unless they have your genetic spawn in their face reminding them about That Guy Who Used To Be Alive.
Not that doing anything with YOUR OWN LIFE would count towards people remembering you. Nope, all the many things, journeys, friends, deeds and creations you make throughout your life count for SHIT, who's going to remember that if you don't have any babies? I for one wouldn't know who the hell Kurt Cobain was if it wasn't for Frances-Bean being in the ladymags every day.

I'm not condemning anyone who does want to have babies, of course I've thought about having babies. Personally I've decided against having any of my own, for two reasons. One, I have a low pain threshold and I don't want to put my body through that shit when I can Two, adopt an already-alive child who doesn't have anyone to love them. I'm looking forward to being mature and established enough to be able to foster kids and work my way through an adoption process, which is daunting (and a very long way away in fantasy land). I don't know if my motives are fucked up but I don't want to do it so that I can have a brood of children to push my last name on and live on in my image. I want to give a home to someone who doesn't have one - and by home I mean someone who cares about them. I guess I just want to help the less fortunate more than I want to be a Mummy.

Of course, my boyfriend likes to counter this by telling me that sooner or later I'll get all clucky and change my mind, because my opinion on children is entirely at the whim of my hormones and you know those uterii, they'll make you CRAZY. And then I can carry on the bloodline just like he wants me to.

Colour me ambitious but I like to think that my life isn't entirely defined by my ability to produce spawn from my womb. Just like every other woman on the planet.